tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post3752277180363144629..comments2023-10-25T05:20:10.712-07:00Comments on Speak Schmeak: The grandmother clichéLisa Braithwaitehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11515770110437411408noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-12341212972005941302009-09-05T08:35:21.940-07:002009-09-05T08:35:21.940-07:00Lisa - thanks for calling me on this. I took the ...Lisa - thanks for calling me on this. I took the Einstein quote not to mean that a grandmother couldn't understand, but if you are speaking to a grandmother, esp. savvy ones such as yours and mine, you need to explain it without buzz words, without jargon or assumptions, you need to explain it to someone who may have a different frame of reference, and who is willing to listen, and even willing to ask questions to understand. Explain it so that someone who isn't in that field of expertise will understand you. <br /> But from your blog post, you see that use of the term grandmother as derogatory, which I had not brought to it. <br /> Good food for thought. Glad I'm following you on twitter.<br />-Linda Bassert,<br />Masterworks Window Fashions & Design, Fairfax, VA<br />@MasterworksDsgnLinda H. Basserthttp://www.masterworksdesignpro.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-39158637902141026392008-06-07T12:12:00.000-07:002008-06-07T12:12:00.000-07:00Thanks, Terry. I acknowledge that it's hard to esc...Thanks, Terry. I acknowledge that it's hard to escape clichés. Using them is an unconscious habit for most of us!Lisa Braithwaitehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10203279973932837403noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-45480775761250921362008-06-07T11:47:00.000-07:002008-06-07T11:47:00.000-07:00Lisa,Thanks for the post.I think it was Ezra Pound...Lisa,<BR/><BR/>Thanks for the post.<BR/><BR/>I think it was Ezra Pound that said that a cliché is a dead metaphor: a cliché is a truism that has lost its original context and the life behind the phrase.<BR/><BR/>I feel that using clichés generally comes across as inauthentic, which is a bane for any presenter.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-58737706415385513082008-06-04T09:12:00.000-07:002008-06-04T09:12:00.000-07:00Thanks for your comment, Jane. You do look much yo...Thanks for your comment, Jane. You do look much younger than your age!<BR/><BR/>After many years working as an advocate for women's organizations, I don't have any trouble making "gentle corrections" when I hear an insensitive comment. I can be very diplomatic. :-)Lisa Braithwaitehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10203279973932837403noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-3574368047525143452008-06-04T05:22:00.000-07:002008-06-04T05:22:00.000-07:00I love this, Lisa! I'm turning 60 in July so I've ...I love this, Lisa! I'm turning 60 in July so I've become more sensitized to dismissive phrases like the grandmother one. I look ten years younger, feel 29 and act somewhere in between.<BR/><BR/>I attribute it to a lack of sensitivity or awareness on the part of the speaker. A gentle correction by you or another audience member would be a gift.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for pointing this out.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-48081437177667189182008-06-03T18:19:00.000-07:002008-06-03T18:19:00.000-07:00Andrew, I definitely don't think anyone is saying ...Andrew, I definitely don't think anyone is saying that we should bend over backwards not to trigger negative thought bubbles in our audiences. Why, just the other day I got into hot water because my language was, let's say, too colorful and evocative.<BR/><BR/>The stereotyped grandma that I'm rebelling against is not the "strength, wisdom, value-driven, motherhood, hugs, holiday visits, grey hair, old-fashioned values" grandma. If that were the case, it probably wouldn't bother me so much. <BR/><BR/>I'm referring to the constant repetition of a negative stereotype which portrays older women (whether they have grandchildren or not), as uninformed, foolish, empty-headed, behind the times, physically unattractive, and with little to offer those of us too sophisticated to appreciate a warm hug, cookie or knitted shawl.<BR/><BR/>And by the way, where's the overused negative grandpa stereotype? Maybe this one bothers me the most because it's reserved for women.Lisa Braithwaitehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10203279973932837403noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-12704547722125383312008-06-03T13:49:00.000-07:002008-06-03T13:49:00.000-07:00You've written a thought-provoking article, Lisa, ...You've written a thought-provoking article, Lisa, but I'm not sure that I agree with your position. (And that is very rare!)<BR/><BR/>I'm not going to defend the use of tired cliches. Like most speakers, I am guilty of using cliches occasionally, and I'm always thankful when someone points it out. It's a habit I try to avoid.<BR/><BR/>However, I'm not sure I agree with the suggestion to avoid using imagery or analogies to help convey a concept on the chance that someone in the audience doesn't share the same perspective on your chosen analogy. If we all eliminated every such figure of speech from our repertoire, we'd all be using dry, dull, and boring language.<BR/><BR/>Speakers (or writers) should be encouraged to select words that pack images.<BR/><BR/>Using the word "grandmother" in a speech evokes an image. For <I>most</I> people in the audience, this image may include qualities such as strength, wisdom, value-driven, motherhood, hugs, holiday visits, grey hair, old-fashioned values. You can build your story or analogy around any of those qualities.<BR/><BR/>Is the image perfect? Perhaps not. Is the image created identical for every audience member? Certainly not.<BR/><BR/>This article includes an photograph of a woman who, given the title of the article, we assume is a grandmother. It's there to evoke an image in our minds of our own grandmothers or other grandmothers we know. Do all of them need glasses? No. Do all of them have grey hair? No. Do all of them have warm smiles? No, unfortunately not. Despite this, the image makes the article stronger.<BR/><BR/>The previous comments are interesting too. Should we, as speakers, choose our words so delicately that we never set off any thought bubbles in our audience at all, because we want to avoid the negative ones?<BR/><BR/>Yes, we all need to be careful not to feed negative stereotypes, but we also need to balance that with the need to incorporate rich imagery and analogies in our speeches.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-44233575097702293012008-06-03T11:52:00.000-07:002008-06-03T11:52:00.000-07:00Thought bubbles sound like a great idea. And scary...Thought bubbles sound like a great idea. And scary -- can you imagine trying to keep up with all of them and then trying to change your presentation each time a new one pops up? LOLLisa Braithwaitehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10203279973932837403noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35758167.post-47935455000103716402008-06-03T10:48:00.000-07:002008-06-03T10:48:00.000-07:00Great post, Lisa, especially the part about tuning...Great post, Lisa, especially the part about tuning out when a speaker hits a particularly sour note. Wouldn't it be revealing (and distracting) (and enlightening) if we could see people's thought bubbles as we spoke? It would sure change the course of a presentation . . .Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com