Top ten torments to terrify your audience

On this oh-so-scaaaarrrry day, I'd like to share some appalling awfulness that makes me cringe in horror. Here are ten gruesome gaffes that have sent chills up my spine.

10. Wailing like a banshee

Listening to this speaker gives me the heebie-jeebies. Her voice is screechy and quaky and she bursts into high-pitched nervous laughter every few minutes. Maybe it's anxiety; maybe it's just her voice. Some deep breathing and relaxation might help this spooky speaker.

9. Creepy crawly clichés

The problem with clichés is exactly the reason people like to use them: they express a popular or common thought or idea. Unfortunately, it's a lot easier to use someone else's decayed corpse of an expression than to come up with something fresh and original. Bury your clichés in the graveyard and move on.

8. Frightful confessions

I'm terrified of what's to come when this speaker tells us she's sorry, she's not very good at public speaking, or she didn't have time to prepare, or she only got two hours of sleep. If her deep, dark secret stays locked in the upstairs room (along with that hideous portrait that ages and and becomes disfigured while its subject remains young and beautiful...) the audience will never know the difference.

7. The walking dead

A speaker who follows every known speaking rule and memorizes ever facial expression, gesture and word, comes across like a zombie, making it difficult to create a human connection. Too many rules kill the soul and the spirit of a speaker. Have some fun, break a rule, rejoin the living!

6. Macabre mispronunciation

This speaker mispronounces even the most common words. "A" is a letter. It rhymes with "day." "A" is a word. It rhymes with "duh." They are spelled the same but pronounced differently. "Mischievous" isn't pronounced "mischee-vee-ous." "Nuclear" isn't pronounced "nuke-yoo-ler." Pronouncing words correctly keeps your audience from howling in agony.

5. Black cat got your tongue?

This speaker says "By the way" or "At the end of the day" or "Am I right?" more than 50 times in the course of a presentation. It's better to say nothing at all than to lean on the same crutch phrase over and over. Embrace the pause; silence doesn't have to be scary.

4. Stake through the heart

I'd rather stay asleep in my coffin than face a maniacal motivational speaker early in the day. Be patient and gentle while the vampires and werewolves drink their coffee and become human again.

3. Time murderer

This speaker takes five minutes of a 20-minute presentation to thank everyone he's ever known and brag about every accomplishment since the age of five. An attention-grabbing opening might keep your audience from running screaming from the twilight zone.

2. Stats from beyond the grave

Have you heard this one? "People fear speaking more than they fear death." Have you ever seen the actual research? Me neither. The original survey that this refers to is over 40 years old. That's one mildewed and stale statistic that should be left alone to rest in peace. Back up your facts or don't use them. Credibility is more important than cleverness.

1. Chills down my spine... literally

A dry flip chart marker truly makes my skin crawl. Check your markers in advance. If they're dry, you have two problems: 1) The audience can't read what you're writing, and 2) The sound of the marker is like fingernails on a chalkboard, a ghastly torture you never want to inflict.

What are your most ghoulish speaking horrors? Share in the comments -- if you dare!

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On The Everything Page you'll find everything you need to build visibility, credibility and influence through engaging presentations that move your participants into action: freebies, low-cost products and courses, and 1:1 coaching!

Where are you focusing your mental energy?

I had some rockin' laser coaching sessions with attendees at the NECF conference last week, and something that came up over and over in these short sessions was the Great "What If?", in the form of "What if I forget my place?" or "What if I get tongue-tied?" or "What if I can't answer a question?" or "What if my face turns red?" or "What if they can tell I'm nervous?"

And on and on.

As I wrote about in this blog post, you can always be prepared for the unknown, to some degree. If you do fear any of the things above, or any of a million other things, you can actually plan for them and anticipate how you would handle the situation. Things don't always go our way, and our best-laid plans don't always succeed. But it's one option.

Here's another option: Stop giving so much mental energy to these fears in the first place.

Planning is one way to disperse the energy. When you put it into a plan, you can let it go and stop taking up space in your conscious mind.

But you can also let it go without planning. You can counter the Great "What If?" with the Great "So What?" So what if you forget your place. You'll find it again. So what if you get tongue-tied? You'll find the word, or another word. So what if they can tell you're nervous? Everyone gets nervous.

When you let go of all this mental energy tied up in the "What Ifs," you can turn your mental energy toward being in the moment with the audience. In fact, sometimes I put so much energy into being with the audience, it causes me to lose my place or forget what I was going to say. Because I'm having a conversation and engaging with them, not repeating a memorized script. And -- oops -- I look at my notes and remember what I wanted to say and I move on.

Put your energy into serving the audience, making your presentation about the value you can give them and the relationship you can build with them. Let your energy flow to them in an open, giving and present way, rather than bottling up all that energy into your worries and fears.

If you need to write a plan beforehand, to disperse some of that energy, do so. And then release the rest of that mental energy to your audience. Get grounded, get relaxed, and then GIVE.

They'll send it back through their facial expressions, their body language, their laughter and participation, and it'll be the most satisfying and enjoyable feeling you can ever have on stage.

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On The Everything Page you'll find everything you need to build visibility, credibility and influence through engaging presentations that move your participants into action: freebies, low-cost products and courses, and 1:1 coaching!

Your questions about the Elite Speakers Mastery & Mentoring Program answered!

Here's a quick reminder that I have a few spots left for the Elite Speakers Mastery & Mentoring Program, so if you're still on the fence, you have one more day to make a decision!

I've gotten some good questions about the Elite Speakers Mastery & Mentoring Program and I thought I'd post them here in case you have the same questions!

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Q: What do you mean by "advanced" or "experienced" speakers?

A: As you may have noticed, this program is for speakers who've been around the block a bit and are looking for support, brainstorming, critique and community with their fellow speakers.

If you speak, on average, eight or ten times a year, then this program is for you. You do not have to be a top-level professional motivational speaker to join the program. You just have to have some experience, a message to share and the desire and motivation to improve and grow.
:-)

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Q: Do I have to be a paid speaker to join the program?

A: NO! As long as you're out there speaking on a regular basis and want to improve your skills and share best practices with others in the same situation, you can be speaking for free or for thousands of dollars per engagement. You are not required to be a paid speaker.

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Q: Why do I have to submit an application?

A: The application process is just my way of making sure that everyone in the group is a good fit with me and with each other. I'm looking for members who are open to learning, open to coaching and truly committed to positive change and growth as a speaker.

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Q: Is this program about selling from the stage?

A: No. This is not a "speak-to-sell" program, although some of you might be interested in learning more about that. If so, then I'll make sure to bring in resources for that interest. But that is not what this program is about.

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Q: How can I get critiques of my presentations if the program is virtual?

A: Members will have the opportunity to upload videos to our private Facebook group for viewing and critique by me and other members. Members can also bring ideas and content for discussion if they don't have video. There will be lots of options for sharing your speaking experiences and questions and getting feedback from the group.

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Q: How does this program work?

A: You'll be invited to 9 monthly group calls, where I'll address any questions or issues that the members have sent me during that time. Members will have the opportunity to get feedback and input from the group on any personal speaking challenges, creative questions, best practices, business issues or anything else related to their speaking goals.

If you miss a call, you'll be able to catch up later with the recording.

I'll also be bringing in appropriate experts for interviews, based on the requests of the group, and we'll have a private Facebook community for everyone to submit videos and ask questions outside of our regular call-in times.

And everyone in the group will get two private coaching sessions with me during the course of the program. Among lots of other goodies and speaking resources!

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Q: How time-consuming is the program? I'm very busy right now.

A: Your only scheduled meetings are the one call a month, that will take approximately one hour. And you'll want to schedule your two half-hour coaching calls with me sometime during the nine months.

Everything else, like Facebook discussions, workbook activities, the home study program, and any other support, questions or conversations take place on your schedule, at your convenience.

Can you fit this into your schedule? Absolutely! And I bet there are some things you spend time on right now that are lesser priorities than reinvigorating your speaking so you can get more visibility, credibility and clients! (For me, some of those things would be social media, cute cat videos, and pinning recipes to Pinterest...)

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Q: I totally get the value of the program, but I'm strapped for cash right now. Is there any way to make the payments easier on my bank account?

A: I'm glad you asked! You may take advantage of my 9-month payment plan to spread your payments out over the course of the program.

Easy peasy!!

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Let me know if you have further questions. And here's the link again to submit your application.

Here's the bottom line:

If you want to focus on your future instead of staying stuck where you are now as a speaker, this program will get you there.

If you're frustrated with playing small and you're looking to building your visibility and credibility as a speaker, this is the place for you.

If you know what you SHOULD be doing, but you're not doing it, this group will get you there.

If you want to increase your reach, grow your dream, build your target audience, get feedback from your peers, and stop sitting on the sidelines, this program is for you!

Here's a reminder of what you'll get when you join the group:

** A 15-minute kick-off strategy session to develop your focus and goals for the program, scheduled as soon as you sign up

** A workbook to keep track of your goals, strategies and successes

** 9 monthly 1-hour group mentoring and accountability calls (plus bonus interviews throughout the program with relevant experts)

** 2 30-minute private coaching calls with me, to be scheduled during the 9 months of the program

** Access to the complete Speak to Engage home study program with pages and pages of resources including articles, blog posts, audios, videos, and my own pre-presentation questionnaires and evaluations I use with my speaking clients

** Access to all my personal speaker resources and connections - if I can't answer your question, I know someone who can!

** Accountability and buddy support with me and the other group members to help you stay on track

** 24/7 access to our private Facebook group for ongoing discussion, brainstorming, video critiques and more accountability

Will I be receiving your application?

P.S. If you've made your final decision that this program isn't for you, I would appreciate your sharing this post with someone you think would benefit from it.

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On The Everything Page you'll find everything you need to build visibility, credibility and influence through engaging presentations that move your participants into action: freebies, low-cost products and courses, and 1:1 coaching!

Top ten reasons to join the Elite Speakers Mastery & Mentoring Program

Photo Credit: sam_churchill

10. Review your overall professional package -- understand how you come across on stage and how your marketing materials, website and personal appearance help or hurt your brand.

9. Set specific action items for accountability as you work to accomplish your goals.

8. Brainstorm ideas with your peers who are out there in the trenches, speaking on a regular basis.

7. Exchange best practices with your fellow experienced speakers.

6. Get feedback from the group to help you analyze and evaluate your presentations.

5. Build your skills, your confidence and your mastery of speaking through a program that’s customized to your exact needs.

4. Test out new material before getting in front of an audience.

3. Participate in a community where you can share experiences (the good, the bad and the ugly) with your fellow advanced-level speakers.

2. Get coaching and mentoring from a speaking expert who knows what you’re going through (ahem... that would be me).

1. Get reinvigorated, break through the barriers that are limiting your progress and potential, and lift your speaking to the next level!

The Elite Speakers Mastery & Mentoring Program starts October 30, but applications are due by October 25, so don't delay! And if you sign up by Friday, October 18, you'll get a whole passel of awesome bonuses, too!

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On The Everything Page you'll find everything you need to build visibility, credibility and influence through engaging presentations that move your participants into action: freebies, low-cost products and courses, and 1:1 coaching!

You're good enough as you are

I met with a client recently who had next to no speaking experience on his current topic. This is a fairly typical situation, where a client comes to me because they have expertise in another area, but are now required by their job to speak on a topic that is new to them.

All the confidence that this person used to have has gone out the window, replaced by anxiety and self-doubt.

After talking to this client and listening to him run through the outline of his presentation, the first thing I told him was that he came across as warm, friendly, approachable and likable, and that this was going to be a huge factor in his success.

The surprise in his voice actually made me a bit sad. He told me that no one had ever told him that, even in his previous speaking training. It made him feel so much better to know that JUST BEING HIM was going to be a benefit to his speaking. That JUST BEING HIM was a good enough place to start.

I find that speakers worry so much about the techniques, the words, their physical appearance, the "ums," the quiver in their voice and the potential for mistakes, that they overlook the major factor of embracing who they are as a person and just connecting with the audience from that place.

I'm not saying that speaking skills aren't important - if that were true, I wouldn't have a job. You still have to learn how to develop and structure an effective presentation and deliver it successfully in a way your audience can understand and remember.

But no amount of skills and polish can overcome your own negative (or even shaky) perception of yourself.

If you feel that you're not good enough ("... smart enough. And doggone it, people like me." I couldn't resist...) as you are, as a person, that insecurity is going to ooze out all over your presentation. In your posture, in your voice, in your facial expressions, in your movements.

You may not be an expert on your topic; your boss may be pushing you to speak on something you know little about. It happens all the time. For that matter, you may work for yourself and be new to your topic and still learning.

The point is: That's okay. You'll get it eventually. You'll keep learning (as we all do) and one day you'll have no qualms whatsoever about standing up and addressing that topic.

But right now, be confident that you are good enough as you are. Make a human connection with the audience like you would with a good friend or beloved family member. Fall in love with the real you and the rest will fall into place.



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On The Everything Page you'll find everything you need to build visibility, credibility and influence through engaging presentations that move your participants into action: freebies, low-cost products and courses, and 1:1 coaching!

Maintaining composure as your top falls off...

Most speakers, no matter how experienced, still have the tiny thought in the back of their head: "What if something goes wrong?" It's part of our preparation to know what we would do if we lost our place, the computer shut down, or a heckler challenged us.

But most of us don't have to worry about wardrobe malfunctions, like this dancer performing with Ricky Martin on Ellen. Look for the one wearing the crop top with spaghetti straps.

Note her calmness and composure as she most certainly realizes her top is slowly coming off, and how she handles herself. She continues giving 100%, even as she feels herself becoming more exposed. She waits as long as she can to leave the stage.

At 1:30, you can see the top start to open in the back.

At 1:45, it's halfway undone (I'm sure she's feeling a breeze at this point and wondering why her top feels loose).

At 2:45, she's holding it in place.

At 2:55, she gracefully exits the stage, still completely in character.

At 3:22, she returns, and seamlessly joins the rest of the dancers for the final pose.

This is what experience and professionalism looks like. No panic, just thinking on your feet and handling the situation in the moment.



Are you an experienced speaker? Do you have all the composure and poise in the world, but get a little lazy with your presentations sometimes, just because you know you can?

Join me on October 10 for my FREE teleclass: "The Top 3 Mistakes Experienced Speakers Make... And What to Do Instead!" and let's reinvigorate your speaking!

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On The Everything Page you'll find everything you need to build visibility, credibility and influence through engaging presentations that move your participants into action: freebies, low-cost products and courses, and 1:1 coaching!

Are you the couch potato of speakers?

We all get a little too laid-back at times. We lose our energy and motivation. We go through the motions.

But pay attention, speakers: If you're not careful, you'll find yourself settling into the comfortable security blanket of mediocrity.

It doesn't have to be that way. Shake off the cobwebs, warm up those stiff muscles, get off the proverbial couch, and let's reinvigorate your speaking!

Watch my video below on how easy it is to become the couch potato of speakers -- and what to do about it!



Or watch it here!

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On The Everything Page you'll find everything you need to build visibility, credibility and influence through engaging presentations that move your participants into action: freebies, low-cost products and courses, and 1:1 coaching!